a boyfriend who cares. where can i get one of those?

Welp, back to the downward spiral again. That didn't take long. I'd like for once to feel like he actually is there for me, or you know, actually fucking does SOMETHING useful. Is that possible? Oh, I'm having some sort of emotional issue? Not there! And how dare I have the audacity to bring up a problem I'm having when HE IS SO STRESSED! God, I'm such a bitch, right? And then when something is physically wrong with me, I don't get taken care of like a normal boyfriend would do for his girlfriend when he loves her, because I'M GOING TO PREVENT HIM FROM DOING HIS JOB! Fuck this. I understand he works in food service. I understand I could get him sick. But every fucking thing comes back to his MOTHER. FUCKING. JOB. I'm getting to the point where I'm almost empathizing with his ex (minus the cheating part) but if you're in a relationship with someone, you actually have to pay attention to them, care about what they're doing, and try to be of some fucking use. Oh, and if I bring up the fact that you suck at being a boyfriend and I have to hear about how "tired, stressed, and overwhelmed" you are, I guess I could also point out that YOU PUT YOURSELF IN THIS POSITION. I work with teenagers all day long, then come home, plan lessons, grade papers, and go to sleep. I'm not out of school at 3:05 and fucking traipsing around New Jersey with my thumb up my ass. I have bills to pay. I am $50,000 in debt. Am I a useless piece of shit? NO. He's seriously one of those people who's "married to the job." I have no idea who the hell is going to marry him, except for maybe some chick who's equally as wrapped up in her profession. I can't tell if I want to vomit, cry, or break the shit out of something. Maybe all three.